Random Philosophies

New House, New Baby, New Job

2010-08-03T03:20:00.000-06:00

Ask me in the past where I would have been at 25 and you wouldn't get an answer that describes my life now. But, I don't think I'll ever be able to describe where I'll be. Here is a my recent update on Facebook:

"Well, it's here. The final day at Idaho Camera. The past 3 and 1/2 years have been a strange mixture of apathy and drama in my life, but have led me to a very happy place with a woman who I love and a beautiful baby girl who has me wrapped around her finger. I pray for continued favor from God"

My baby daisy was born on May 3rd. She's more than beautiful. I can stare at her for hours and just be overwhelmed with her, much like her mother. Now at 3 months old she has some more personality and I can begin to pick on her a bit. Soon she'll be running about this new home of ours. (It finally feels like a home and not just a house.)

Today was the start of my new job at Larry H. Miller Honda Boise. I left Idaho Camera after 3 and 1/2 years . The above status update really describes where I my life has been: a mixture of apathy and drama with lots of God's favor. Kim and I have done okay with ourselves, and not by any working of our own. It's pure favor the stems from a lot of grace.

I'm excited for the new opportunities and adventures in life. I'm thankful for all the grace given to me and my family. Thankful.

New Photo's Up

2010-04-21T15:00:00.001-06:00

It's easy to get lost in life. There are so many distractions. I'm attempting to get back to the things I love. Simplifying my life will lead to more concentrated impact. Back to writing, back to photography, back to documenting life. More heartfelt conversations with friends and family, lots of barbecues with good food and drink, sunsets, morning coffee, and gardening.

If I Neglected A Child...

2010-04-14T12:53:00.000-06:00

I know, I know. Look at that last post. It's a sad repeating theme throughout this blog. "Hey everyone, sorry for not writing, but I'm catching my second wind..." Well, it's probably my sixth wind now.

If I neglected a child in the way I have my blog, he or she would be taken from me. Luckily, a blog doesn't need food or water. I'm going to make an attempt to start reconnecting with my internet savvy side. I have let my network of relationships suffer and that is never, never a good thing.

When I originally started out blogging it was a way for me to connect to people while on the mission field. People could read the stories of my travel and see what I was accomplishing in this world. The goal was to take a person working a 9-5 job and give them a cross-cultural experience. Well, now I'm that person. I have a job and the last time I stepped on a plane to traverse internationally was years ago.

So, now I'm going to just write. About what? Whatever comes to mind. Still my experiences and thoughts, but on a broader perspective. I know all you have been biting your fingernails anxiously awaiting my new blog posts. You may stop now. (It's a really bad habit, anyway.) I'm coming back to the roots of this thing.

Where Have I Gone To?

2009-08-22T11:16:00.002-06:00

It's been a fast year between this post, and my last. Last year I started school full time, while continuing to work full time, leaving me with literally no time at all. It seems like an exageration, but my schedule had me up at 7:45 am for school, and I got home after work at 9:30 pm. Homework kept me busy until sleep time, if it allowed for that.

Yet, now I sit feeling the want to write again. The schedule made it tough, and little was happening in my day or mind to write about. But, and I make no guarantees, I think I'll start throwing a post up again.

Newness Comes Back Into My Life

2008-07-28T13:52:00.003-06:00

What a strange time in life. I've been home over a year and a half now, and thus far have not really done much of anything. There was the feeling that I should just relax and keep my driven self still for a bit. I have the type of personality that I need to keep moving, constantly changing things, and finding new challenges or I feel a bit dead, or useless inside.

Nonetheless, this year has been a strange one for me. The good news is that I feel it's time to begin the task of getting my education back on track. I left high school believing that I would never attend college, and everybody stared at me with confusion. Considering how much I love to learn, and where I feel it to be a need to keep my life on a perpetual motion, I can now understand why they opposed me.

I'll admit that I do feel a bit of nervousness about this venture, but looking back on how I start everything this is quite normal. My perfectionist spirit is ruthless, and demanding leaving me up to the task of proving things to myself. I recognize this, and use it to my advantage to urge me to be at the top of my game. In the end, I will overcome school with the brutal drive that has always spurned me forward. Just pray I don't leave with inexcusable debt.

Oh, International Business with a minor in Japanese.

Even If No One Reads

2008-06-03T15:55:00.002-06:00

It has been months since I last posted anything on this blog. Months that really have just kind of vanished amongst the routine, sadly and not sadly. I originally started blogging as a way update people back home in The States when I was travelling abroad working as a missionary. Within that context, there were walls that allowed me to write about certain subjects and topics. At time is felt a bit constricting, and downright boring. Writing while having to exclude is never very fun. Is limited expression really expression at all?

I am now going to use this blog as a source for me to gain a better understanding of the world I find myself in, regardless if anyone really reads it. I will make judgments, and make mistakes, and months down the road I'll be able to discover them while reading through past blogs. This does require a sort of vulnerability, and god forbid I should ever become a politician, because these writings I'm sure would kill any sort of campaign. Sad, eh?

I'll write when I feel like it, and I'm sure there will be some months that I skip typing a word at all. So be it.

There Is A Time For Change

2008-02-10T08:40:00.000-07:00

No, no, this not an Obama blog. For some time I've sat about Boise just waiting. I felt secure in not trying to grab the wheel and force something to happen. But, I can only do so for so long before this becomes detrimental to me. Drive and ambition have been a part of my life, even in times where I did not recognize it I was still moving somewhere.

With the change in weather, I hope that a spring will come into my life as well, and that I will have something to look forward to, something to develop. Perhaps God was right in making me wait in this mundane stage, as I get very restless and he can channel my rebellious nature towards his workings.

"If a man hasn't discovered something that he will die for, then he is not fit to live." MLK

Still Shooting Film and Off the Floor

2008-01-06T18:08:00.000-07:00

As the title shows, I was sleeping on the floor for a number of months. Now, before you think a sympathetic thought, it was by choice, mostly. When I had left The States I had sold most of my goods, believing that I would be gone longer than a year, which we all know did not happen. Since then it has been a long process of getting back on my feet and charting out my next expedition.

I picked up a film camera (Canon EOS 3), and paired it up with a 50mm prime lens. This being the most economical solution to getting a camera back in my hands. It's been a wonderful experience. The hope was to buy another digital camera, but the equipment that I look towards is still more than I have. This made me restless at first, but I have come to peace with still working with my film camera, and will probably put my money towards my lens, so that my transition back to digital will be easier.

My hopes for the future are to begin working in a dark room, and potentially buy the equipment for one; to start going to the Y on a regular basis; and to start with Big Brothers, Big Sisters. We'll see how those turn out.

It Is By Thinking That We Save Ourselves Death While Living

2007-11-19T19:58:00.000-07:00

©Darnell K. L. Weightman
©Darnell K. L. Weightman

I use iTunes to hold the library of my music, and on it I have a shopping cart of around $500.00 of future music to purchase. I would have more, but they limit the $500.00 for my shopping cart.

Every couple of months I go through the whole cart and listen to the 30 second stints of a song, and my has more thoughts than I get my entire week. I feel sort of vegetated at the moment. I make enough at my job to pay my bills, and have a little bit of spending money, but it places me in the beautiful cycle of always having to spend the majority of my time while I'm awake at doing something that I wouldn't do for free. Thus, I find myself exhausted, and often quite numb due to the common routine that I must do in order to simply exist.

During the week while driving to work, I realized I need to walk more in the parks, to get out of my apartment and feel the wind and rain that we have right now. I need music and books to flood my mind with new thoughts, new arguments, and to stir my soul so easily made drunk by the mundane realities of this life. I need to shut of my TV and spend a night with music, a glass of wine, and a book the invokes my philosophical mind to become active again.

Photo Shoots of the Couey's

2007-11-12T15:37:00.000-07:00

©Darnell K. L. Weightman
©Darnell K. L. Weightman
©Darnell K. L. Weightman

©Darnell K. L. Weightman

©Darnell K. L. Weightman
©Darnell K. L. Weightman
©Darnell K. L. Weightman
©Darnell K. L. Weightman

©Darnell K. L. Weightman
©Darnell K. L. Weightman

A collegue at work asked me if I would shoot him and his sister. By shoot I mean with a camera. Comming from Idaho, I do have to specify this or people give me funny looks.

A Bit Neglectful

2007-10-21T23:13:00.000-06:00

Yes, it's true. I have been a bit neglectful on my blog these days. With working 40 hours a week I come home and feel a bit tired, and being that those 40 hours are in the prime of my day there is very little exciting to read about.

I'm in need of travel to free up my mind, and open my thoughts to find themselves to conclusions. Leaving behind the standard routine places me on a path that raises many questions, and thus leaving my blog far more exciting than explaining how the retail season is going.

I will admit that as my camera sits upon my tripod and stares at me opened eyed, lens cap removed, it seems to tell me that it's a portal to my soul. Not sounding too new age'y, I am really trying to figure out what place my photography has in my life. Will it be a hobby only, or perhaps more? It's a flooded market out there, and I need to be the best. I question this.

The Color of Burnt Orange.

2007-09-19T22:02:00.000-06:00

This is a pic of Joe, my roomate in South America. A sort of looking back, he has.

Fading murals have always seemed a bit sad to me. At one point some individual birthed an image with the hope that the world would see a message, but now it fades and cracks; a vision lost. I feel a bit like that in life at the moment. I'm working to pay the bills, and finding it hard to see how this time in my life will serve me, except when I actually sit down at the depth of the depression and actually reposition myself to see how the things I am learning are going to pay off in the future. It takes a good look, and change of perspective in order to say, "Oh, now I see. This all makes sense now."

This blog has been long over due, but there has been little inspiration, or need. I must admit that I write not for you, but probably more for me. It's a sort of relief to know that somehow my thoughts have been recorded to those who are interested. We all want to be known, I suppose.

The Fall season is upon us, I can feel it in the air. I await it with eager expectation, and also with a sort of preparedness. Like many others, the fall often brings on a sort of seasonal depression. It's a depression that most cannot understand unless they are of the sort to, in a queer way, look forward to this low, moody period. For me, it's a time to refocus. To dig deep down in the mess of who I am, and realign my life with who I truly am. It's a love, hate relationship.

For now, I will work hard towards earning a digital camera to allow me to continue to grow in this strange art. I hope to share it with many of you.

Much Love, Darnell

I May Break A Leg Jumpin' Off, But This Train's A Crashin'

2007-08-21T08:25:00.000-06:00

We no doubt live in a wealthy country, and one that sets us up to be consumers. We buy. That's what were tempted, trained, and corralled to do.

The square footage of homes increases as families grow smaller, and who hasn't heard about the amount of average debt that people hold? (Somewhere around $6,600.00 is the median for credit card debt.) We have learned how live luxurious lives. It's a competition out there. Who feels safe in their Ford when parking next to Jaguars, BMW's, and $60,000.00 Humvee?

This concerns me in that I feel as a cow raised to soon become a plate of Veal. I've been cornered in to become fat, and to keep me from any sort of work. Save? I'll just apply that money to a monthly payment so I can have it now.

I'm a consumer. I was raised that way in an American world where holding a large amount of debt is the norm. I need a bigger house, a better car, newer clothes, and great bed to gain proper rest. With the leftovers of my paycheck I'll help some charitable organization. (Quite contrary from those ancient biblical days of giving the best, and first of my earnings.) And, thus continues my walk upon the beaten, and mundane path of life.

From a Jones Soda bottle cap I read a quote, "Miss the bus on purpose." At this point I think I'll be trying to jump off this train, miss that bus, and make an attempt to hold off from these needed luxuries.

This Is Pathetic

2007-08-18T08:34:00.000-06:00

The local news was reporting this morning that an Italian town is offering to pay individuals cash to lose weight. I don't like to be a bleeding heart missionary talking only about starving children, but does this not seem disgusting to anyone? I don't use such a word to describe it casually. The idea that people who cannot keep the food from their mouth on their own account, lest they be paid, while there are individuals who will make less than what they will be paid by their town.

As much as I hate to state the well known fact that people will starve, this is the only thing that seems to combat such an idea as "good" for the mere fact of it's irony.

Anyways, that's my soapbox. Here's a link if you would like to read about it.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070816/ap_on_he_me/paid_to_diet

"The Devil Came On Horseback"

2007-08-10T13:04:00.001-06:00

This looks like a very interesting documentary.

http://www.thedevilcameonhorseback.com/

The Mountains They Call, But Not In A Crazy Way

2007-08-01T23:23:00.000-06:00

With rolls, and rolls of film in my hand, I step out to use some of these films for the first time. Eager expectation, and excitement for the hopeful shots that await me in the higher mountains of Idaho. This Saturday I'll alas be making my way up the well known road to Cascade to meet with friends, and we will all embark upon a journey to The Sawtooth Mountain Range. It's been well over a year since I've been up in the mountains, and going on a good two since I've been able to make a trip like this.

In my hope to have some time to consider my future, I will be seeking as to where my photography will take me. How much of my life will I devote to this? Will it be a career, or just a tool? The competition for photography is thick, and the pay is generally pretty lousy for the work and skill that it requires. I'll seeking this while setting my camera up in hopes of capturing the light well enough to paint this experience.

©Copyright Darnell K. L. Weightman 2007

Amazing Strength

2007-07-27T23:22:00.000-06:00

Kids are strong...It's the adults who are weak. That little guy there to my left is my nephew, Avery. I love the kid. I love to run in the park with him, and sit on a bench and watch him play, give him a hard time about girls at school, and have him flex his muscles to show off his strength.

I feel like some old man, looking back at kids and the park and being able to sit there for an hour just admiring how they can enjoy life so much even though things at home may not be perfect. They're carefree, and without stress. I worry about bills, about that sound my car makes, the hours of sleep that I'll get tonight, and just making it through the day; but he's different. I can get him a book on monster trucks and his whole week will be good in his eyes.

Everything in our life is really a big fight for comfort here in America. None of us are starving, or without a real source for shelter. When I was in India we were reading about people dying from the cold in the street. People who work hard everyday, and after long hours go "home" to rest on the ground next to a building. We can all live well off of $20,000 a year, but all of us would complain. After all, it's our right to own our house, right? To drive a nice car?

My life has become a lot more complicated since I've been home. It used to be that I got some food, and paid for my stay at a place and that would get me by. Now, I have air conditioning that I have to pay for. It's ironic to me. I fight for comfort. I want more. For some reason I need more security than a full stomach, I need to compete against my neighbor who makes more than me.

I don't want to sound negative, but am I the only one who looks at my unquenchable thirst and says, "What the hell am I doing this for?"

"I need leather seats?" I say to myself. I'm not being critical of others, I'm targeting number one, me. When I truly examine what I want in life, I'm fine with a tank of gas, and my needs met.

I'm tellin' you, kids are tough. I went through a lot as a kid. Where did that strength go? It left when comfort became king, when need was usurped by want. Like I said, it's the adults who are weak.

Quick Thought

2007-07-26T23:10:00.001-06:00

There is something terribly wrong when we creatures, created in our Creator's image, live a life in which we do not use our creativity. We settle with finding a skill, mastering it, and milking it for our money. It becomes our safety, our formidable wall against the woes of life. God forbid we should end up in a place where we choose safety over risk, comfort or challenge, and death over creativity.

Ill Content With Staying Normal

2007-07-26T19:49:00.000-06:00

The majority of people that I run into seem to look at me with an awkward angle. They don't quite know what to make of whatever it is that they're staring at. It's not bad, I just think it's something like a Forrest Gump quote, "Your boy is different." Eventually people enjoy my company, or utterly hate me, but I tend to remain unaffected with either. You see, I'm in my own world. A separate world.

A funny quote that I tell people is, "I see with perfect 20/20 vision, the rest of the world wears bi-focals." I say this as a joke, as I am a sarcastic and witty individual, and I recognize that I'm a bit odd. Being no bearded lady, my oddness seems to come with the way that I think, and see life. And, I still recognize that my life will not be normal; or at least I hope not. Normal is fine. Normal is just that...normal. Yet, there is an urge for me to start running down the street and never stop running. I don't love running, so that's not the reason. It's more that I feel as if I'm going crazy; like one of those geniuses that are so wrapped up on what they want to accomplish that they end up in a mental institution.

In the end, I suppose that it's this: when one is in complete discontent with life, it's best to change some things up. I believe that this comes more from the fact that I have absolutely no idea of what I am going to do in life. This is normal, I know. But, remember, I hate normal. No, in actuality I'm fine with this, but where ever I end up I'm sure that it will be doing something that people will surely shake their heads at. I mean, c'mon, it wouldn't be Darnell if I didn't cause heads to shake.

Sometimes We Try, But It Just Ain't Gonna' Happen

2007-07-25T10:44:00.000-06:00

A few years after a change in my worldview, and some fuel in the ol' think tank, I jumped on a boat headed for scholastic success. I'm in need of an audience, and as much as I love my dear blog, it doesn't quite reach the ends of the earth. Thus the reason I chose to enroll in school. Plans change again.

My family is far from rich, and provisions for college are limited to a toll of zero, and the government places me in the role of a 'dependent,' leaving me with few funds to tap into for my education. As a missionary, my income has been pretty limited, and I'm having a hard time locating alternative loans. School is on my heals, and not having the money to pay for it I'll be setting that goal further up the road as to when I can afford it.

This really is quite heartbreaking for me, but I doubt that any motivation will fade over a few years. In the photo above I'm with my grandpa, an old rugged marine who lives on the island of Okinawa. He's invited me to Japan for a bit, and I'm looking into it. I was planning on a minor in Japanese, but I may have the ability to gain some skills while there, and await until I'm old enough to qualify for independent status. Besides, it's been over 6 months that I've been in The States, I'm in need for a taste of the foreign; and this brings me to learn more about my roots of the Japanese culture.

Ideas Worth Spreading

2007-07-23T20:18:00.000-06:00

Hey, here's a pretty interesting site. Most of you who are the type to buzz by a persons blog would appreciate such a site as this. The rest of you can just go to the Flickr badge to see photos.

www.Ted.com

So, Apparently They Want Money For School

2007-07-18T17:48:00.000-06:00

It's the little foxes that spoil the vine, they say. Big plans can be ruined by minute details, like needing money in order to go to school. You see, I fall in this distinct class of individuals that find themselves in need of a decent chunk of change for school, and having left high school believing that I would never attend college my piggy bank is one that does not sit upon my shelf with much weight.

The government considers you a dependent of your parent until the age of 24, yes, that old. This leaves me, a 22 year old male, with the appearance that I have more money than I do. My income this last year was just shy of not having to file for taxes, but when my parents income is taken in there appears to be more. It's not much, but enough for the government to decline on offering me a hand at this point for school. The difficult thing is that my parents will not be able to help me out during school; I'll be on my own.

A pilgrim, I find myself searching through loans in hopes that I'll be able to attend and find enough money to pay my monthly bills. A disheartening position, but I'm sure it will all work out fine.

How Many Degree's Will I End Up With In the End?

2007-06-27T22:02:00.000-06:00

I don't know if any of you recall from my last blog about my considerations of becoming a lifelong student, but the more that I see what college is going to be, it seems more and more of a possibility.

On another note, the idea of blogging is a new concept to the world. I try to write one of these about once or more a week, without any idea as to who is reading this. Possibly no one. Perhaps a few people stumble upon this, and read an article, leaving saying, "humph." I don't really write for anyone in particular, except myself. It opens me up. Relaxes me, and throws my thoughts out into the open for whomever to read.

Each blog is different, as every person is different. The words on this paper, should be in the tone of my voice. My sarcasm finds it's way, and my rebellious nature leaves me little explaining as to why I believe what I believe. I just believe it, and you should too. But, then again, what does a photographer have to say? If anyone stops by, it's probably more for the pictures more than anything else. God knows that if you have a blog, and no pictures, I'm less likely to scan the text. It's not shallow, I'm just a visual type of guy.

Anyways, I'm stressed about school, more the paying for it than the joining of those that mark themselves as full time students. I have bills to pay, but I hope to actually learn in school. I don't want a degree for money, but that I'm hungry. So, I need a better job with more pay and less hours in the hope that God will somehow work his way into directing my life to having a greater effect through education. Pray with me, would'cha?

Learning To Breathe

2007-06-26T22:37:00.000-06:00

I finished up my orientation for Boise State today, and one of the sessions that I stepped in on was how to manage the stress in your life now that you're an adult comming back to school; Work, bills, kids (none here), and just life itself. The main idea was this, you cannont change the past, and you cannont control the future. So, how much time do actually spend in the present? We stress over the mistakes in the past, and try to figure out what we have to do for the future.

If time were a percentage, how much in your 24 hour day do you think about things in the past or future. In my day, probably at least 80% is spent thinking of things elsewhere than the here and now.

We then did a breathing exercise. Just breath in, and then out. A full deep breath, which you don't get when you stress, calms you down quite a bit. I ended up staring at the wood floors we were on, and realized how beautiful they were. Beauty is something that can only be enjoyed in the now, and it's vital to life. When eating, do you taste the flavor of the food? Or, are you like me and shove it down quickly to get on to the next thing in your life. I think I get more enjoyment pumping my gas than a meal.

So, the goal is to breathe in, give myself some slack, and see the beauty of the world again. Maybe than I can start enjoying photograhpy on a daily basis again.

Blanco & Negro

2007-06-16T22:12:00.000-06:00

These are all shots of 35mm film from my new camera. All of them are with a 50mm, as it's the only lens I own at the moment. Hopefully, and soon, I'll be able to build a decent collection of gear before my next trip to wherever it is I go. I am eager to travel again, though, but a year of school should do me well to serve my time here in Boise.

New photos will be placed on my Flickr site, as I continue to capture more of life.

Currently I'm reading "Three Cups of Tea," about Greg Mortenson building schools in the high regions of Pakistan. It's an extremely interesting book about how he started with a failed K2 climb, and created a system of over 50 schools to educate those of the birth place of the Taliban.

My Lover Has Returned

2007-06-09T10:26:00.000-06:00

Ahhh, the romance begins again! I write quickly, and with good news. I was able to snag a camera that came into work, (Idaho Camera), for a mere 245 bones for a body only. It's a steal, considering it sells brand new for around $900. I bought a 50mm 1.8, a nice inexpensive lens and was able to snap off my first roll of B&W film. They turned out beautifully, and I'll be scanning the negatives to place em' online.

My apologize for the lack of writing. I've been settling into my studio apartment, and the job I work has me working some the worst hours to get things done, and for relationships. My Friday is really Sunday, leaving me exhausted to get up to the earlier service for church. I'm not much of a morning person anymore, as I yawn throughout the entire day with a cup of coffee in hand, till come 9pm when I'm wide awake ready to take life on. Yeah, it leaves with later mornings and melancholy nights of writing and reading. I'll try to get back very quickly, though and get to writing once I get some internet at my house.

Much love, and appreciation for the prayers to get my photography back up and running.

The Hope In That Things Do Fall Apart

2007-05-21T13:53:00.000-06:00

Life is hard. We're surrounded everyday by stories of people whose lives have fallen apart. I've worked at mission houses hearing stories of men who owned homes, had families, and at one point in there life thought they had life by the tail with dreams and plans to come out on top, but somehow things didn't go as they planned.

My short life I can look back at the plans that I've had that have already changed. Most of them haven't been for the worse, but I can see that I had little control over much of what my life has been.

I've been asking more and more questions about my own family, curious to see how they ended up where they find themselves today. None of them admit to having things go as they planned. This can seem depressing looking at it with a certain angle, but I see hope in it. It's okay for things to fall apart; for plans to end up like and unraveled rope leaving only threads. I've lost money, had things stolen, but my day to day life remains the same. I get a cup of coffee in the morning, and at least a meal in the day, rest at night.

My future I look at different now. I no longer, or should I say, attempt not to strong arm life, leaving fists of white knuckles. I'll ride the bull, as they say in rafting. Sit on the front, hold on for dear life, and let the river take me. In end everyone gets wet, but there's always a sun to dry me out.

The Move To Watch:
House of D

Origin, Roots, and Discovery

2007-05-14T12:29:00.000-06:00

Jon From China

Taking a look at that title, those are some powerful words not used everyday, possibly monthly. I stayed up last night, as I usually do, not fighting sleep as I must force myself to lay my head down and close my eyes, but watching t.v. Scanning the guide, I saw it there again, Independent Lens. Catching my interest with such a title of The Cats of Mirikitani I knew that I could get something from this one.

Jimmy Mirikitani is followed by a camera, revealing his life journey. He's an 81 year old man, formerly homeless, and a beautiful artist, mixing the style of the orient with artisans of the west. As all the homeless have, story is told. Jimmy was just a youth during the time of WWII; born in Sacramento, and grew up in Hiroshima. I'm sure you can see where this going, as all these words fit as puzzle pieces.

February 19, 1942 the American Government issued Executive Order 9066, stripping the constitutional rights of nearly two thirds of Americans born of Japanese descent. Deprived of his possessions, and separated from his family members, Jimmy was deemed and "Alien Enemy" and placed in an Internment Camp. There in the desert he witnessed the death of his people, and said his last goodbye to his sister, his last living sibling.

The story picks up as Jimmy is 80 years old, and after the 9/11 is taken in by a film maker who decided to uncover the story of this artist.

My family was spared these camps due to the fact that they lived in Hawaii where Japanese made 1/3 of the population proving too much to transport, and a detrimental hit to the economy. The story struck, though, as in the past few years I have been researching my roots, both Japanese and Lakota Sioux Indian. More and more I have been on a path to discovering the culture of the two, and falling in love with them, identifying with them.

I hope to believe that I will somehow use photography to open up the eyes and minds of people to things that can be captured by a single frame; creating a story, and weaving a message with them. Life seems to be a box that I keep pulling things out of without a sight of the bottom, and I hope the facet of areas that I am learning, all will will be stitched together to see a pattern and a solution to the questions that I have.

For Reference

http://www.thecatsofmirikitani.com/

http://www.tulelake.org/

To 'Feng Shui' Life

2007-04-17T21:49:00.000-06:00

If only we could organize life into simple black and white boxes, neatly and cleanly label everything with sticky tags and a sharpie marker, and alas see the vast world slimmed down by the angles and corners of this system. Now, back to reality where life seems to be a mess like that of a malt that has found itself the victim of a blender with no lid.

We don't know what to make of the mess that lies before us. It's stressful, and plagues us when we drive behind red lights, sit watching the clock till five, and lay with moonlight upon us. There are times that I walk outside and actually stare up at the sky. At that moment I am again amazed at what surrounds me. I remember that life is more than bills upon a messy desk, debt upon a card, or the vague depression due to this pursuit of happiness. I breathe and feel it. It feels like oxygen to new lungs again. The sky, it's there again, and it's beautiful.

Here in the Northwest we tend towards a granola type of life. Mountains, birds, hikes and the camping lifestyle. 'I'll load up the jeep with the gear while you pack fruit and yogurt, oh, and don't forget that granola.' We end up surrounded by beauty and feel a sense a relief like, 'everything's going to be alright, after all.' But, for some reason it doesn't seem to last once we hit the five o' clock after our spiritual enlightenment.

I'd like to find some way to remember, to not be running late, and spend my last five minutes before work just staring at the sky, and remembering 'everything's going to be alright, after all.' Father, make the air taste sweet again. Let me awake each day like I've just fought my way from the bottom of a lake and survived death. That air would taste good.

A New Site On the Board

2007-04-10T10:02:00.000-06:00

Independent Lens, a new site I just threw up after watching one of its amazing documentaries on a Chinese blue jeans factory. It was a lower budget documentary, but showed a sad side of the booming economy of China, and how the western world is contributing towards the mistreatment of the migrant workers.

To watch it is to see where America was during the industrial revolution, causing feelings of our naive state and somewhat hypocritical standings to come about. Another form of Guantanamo, so to speak.

I try to stay away from wearing a heart on my sleeve, and seek action with the hope that they speak loudly enough. We are often a generous people, and I believe that the majority of us would be willing to help if we knew how. We do try to help while maintaining our current lifestyle, which may eventually cause a problem as sacrifice does not allow such a thing, but I prefer at the moment to focus my life to saying how can we make it easier and more accessible for people to become involved?

I hope to find some solutions to this question.

Thoughts While Watching "The Interpreter"

2007-04-09T11:40:00.000-06:00

It is now that the feelings of travel begin to creep in again, assuring me that somewhere in my life there remains a place for some working of international travel. As I tell everyone, "It gets in your blood." Nearing the end of a time in another country you always look forward to home and the flavor of the place that you grew up in. The mountains again, the clean air, fresh coffee, good tobacco, family and friends, and all that entitles that word home. The definition is different for us all, but it's how we would describe comfort.

There are some that come off from world travel with a change of world view, and that helps them in shaping their lives back home. It helps give some definition of the calling on their lives. I come back and feel more secure in the position that I took that I would be more involved in the future with traversing this world. Photography will be one of my assets, but I hope to gain more.

Somehow I'll be stretched from this continent to others, finding myself in many new doorways.

Ohayou, Konnichiwa, Konbanwa

2007-03-31T12:33:00.000-07:00

In Search of A Home

Life moves fast. I notice that more and more each day, and especially each year. But far more than one year of my life, I look at one year added to my nieces or nephews lives and I can see that this commodity is not a renewable resource, and at one point I'll have spent most of it. I sound like some old man saying, "oh, you grow up so fast." Not my words exactly as I have far more style, but the same meaning is evident.

Tallie marks adding up to around three months are on a wall in my brain of my return from South America, and it seems to have been spent quickly. The quick update is this, I have a vehicle now, a new job at Idaho Camera, (Sweet! Cameras in my hands, even if I don't own any of them.), and preparing for school. Of course, I've procrastinated on finalizing my application, fearing some letter of failed admittance, but I think everything will work out fine.

I'll be a struggling college student, but that generally means that I'll be making more money than when I was active in foreign missions. But! Fear not. Missions has not slipped out of my blood by any means. If anything, I've come closer to finding my place of working in ministry.

The language at hand is Japanese, hence the greeting. I suppose that will be my next place of learning when it comes to a foreign land, but I'm chomping at the bit to get back over to India to unload with a camera lens.

This is the first post to this new blog, but many will follow in suit. Once a camera of my own is in my hands you'll be sure to see this world through my eyes again.